Hallo Clifford!
I sat in the church Sunday and was totally overwhelmed by the ‘sharing’ stories and realized that each person has his/her terrifying story to tell! I felt such a deep sense of understanding and wanted to reach out and touch each and every Noupoort resident and tell them that they are special, even though they don’t believe it themselves.
I was thinking that I wanted to share as well, but felt it wasn’t my place as those special people have so much hurt and fear in their lives and that they needed sharing much more than I did. Hope it makes sense to you
But I am going to share now via e-mail, and maybe next time you could share it with all.
Hallo, I am Maryke and my husband, Elmore and me have been in the program for six months now and what an amazing journey. What started as the most difficult and scary decision in my life turned into the biggest wonder in my life!
Last year I was feeling like a bystander, watching my life fall to pièces. I was busy losing my husband and my son. I felt as if I was in a whirlpool from which I would never escape. Everyday was like a battlefield in my house. And not just the battlefield between me and my son, a battlefield between my son and my husband, me and my husband and worst of all, the battle raging in my head. I could not sleep and then again, I could not be awake.
I was totally lost. Two people who I love dearly were drifting further away by the second.
One day, after a tremendous battle I went on my knees for the first time in years. I told God that I was tired and did not have the strength to keep the peace in my house anymore. Everything was spiraling out of control and I did not know what to do. I told him that I am going to give all of this over to Him and that He should take control. I had nothing more to give and the worst was realizing that I did not know what to give anymore. I ended my prayer with these words: “Here, waar u my lei, sal ek gaan. Ek sal myself neerlê by U besluite en dit deurvoer.”
But, it did not seem as if God was really interested in my problem. I still felt lost and alone. But I was wrong. God put people on my path and they directed us to church. And the very first day I went, God had a special message for me: “Everything will work according to My plan”
But there is a Thomas of little fait in each one of us. That little voice that tells you that God will not listen. God will not help. And yes, I felt that way as well.
But, I had good reason to feel that way. Because, even though I was committed to church, Elmore did not get better. He actually went from bad to worse. The verse “Bring die kindertjies na my toe” kept on refraining in my head and I could not understand. I brought Elmore, I was praying, crying, fighting, but nothing was getting beter!
Then God sent my eldest son with a message “Ma, Elmore het hulp nodig.”
As if I did not know that! And my eldest son told me to put Elmore into Noupoort. However, I could not. I was still thinking that I could fix this. I could take away Elmore’s pain and hurt. I could heal him and that when I’ve done it, Elmore will be fine again.
But i was wrong. Elmore drifted even further away. Then I called my father. I said to him, “Pa, ek het nou alles probeer om vir Elmore te help, maar ek weet nie verder nie.”
I did not even have to say anything further. My dad was just waiting for my call! How amazing was that?! He has already contacted someone who has been in Noupoort and has already made an appointment with him for us.
My husband and I went through and spoke to Jannie Dreyer. What a wonderful God given helping hand! All the arrangements were made, and Elmore was sent to Noupoort.
He did not know that he was on his way to Noupoort, he was under the impression that he was on his way to Danabaai for a holiday.
I was so scared that he would hate me for what I’ve done.
But God knows his children. He knew that Elmore has a wonderfully understanding spirit in his heart and Elmore realized that this was the best for him.
At first, I know it was difficult for him, but later on, he just went for it! I can see that he is happy, even though Noupoort is a hectic place. He has actually started laughing and joking again – something that I missed for over a year in my house. What a joy that is to me! I can see that he has taken responsibility for himself and his future and I know that nothing will be able to hold him back.
I am proud of him! I know now that I did not have the right ‘equipment’ to help in. I knew that he had it in him, but he just needed a little nudge in the right direction and that is what Noupoort gave him.
I want to say thank you, first to God! Thank you for the doors you opened for my son and me. Thank you for all the wonderful helping hands You gave. Thank you God for listening and acting in such a wondrous way.
Then I want to say Thank you to Elmore. Elmore, the light of my life, thank you for your positive spirit and the way you turned a negative into a wonder. Thank you for your smile this weekend. Thank you for talking to me and sharing your thoughts. Thank you for saying you are sorry. Thank you for saying thank you.
I want to thank Noupoort for being there. Each and every one of you. Thank you for offering up your time and life to help others. God will bless you all.
For each resident in Noupoort I want to say:
You are going through a very difficult time in your life. What you should remember is that it was your choices that opened the door of Noupoort to you. Do not fight it, because it is God’s way of telling you that He cares! He cared enough to bring you to Him at Noupoort and that it is now your chance to open your heart and take Him in. He is knocking, all you have to do is to open the door.
You are all special. Each one of you. From the beautiful lady that had the abortion to the smart and witty young man who is HIV positive.
Each one here is hand picked. Of all the addicts out there, you were chosen to share in Noupoort! It is not something that happens to all addicts. No, Noupoort is something that happens to a select few! No matter how you landed here, whether it is by court, or maybe your parents, grand parents, wives or husbands. It doesn’t matter! What matters is, that you are here. You are sharing in a privilege that only a few people can ever know and have the good fortune to share in.
You are the only one that can make a success of Noupoort. I know it is hectic with the discipline, CI and hard work and I’m sure the food is something all of you complain about. But ... it is nothing compared to the dark and desolate world of drugs and addiction. And then ... what you are going through now, is nothing compared to the blessings and your bright future waiting at the other side of the fence! It is nothing compared to the love of the people that believe in your abilities, waiting for you to finish this journey. It is nothing compared to the joy you will bring to others when finally you say good bye to Noupoort when you have finished with this program. It is nothing compared to the wonderful gift you will be giving yourself by finishing this program successfully by giving it your all. It is nothing compared to the sense of accomplishment you will feel when you commit to yourself and make an investment in your future by making a success of this hard journey!
Always remember.
You might feel that you are nothing in the world, but for someone you are the world!
Keep your head high and God even higher, and you will reap the wonderful benefit of being the best person that you can be!